Интервью с Д из Mook Book. Часть 3

http://misfitmimes.blogspot.com/2010/11/more-from-mo...

Though you finished sixth at the Olympics, you have received a lot of offers for various projects. Why do you think so many offers have come your way?

I think it's because a lot of people support not only my performance, but also my opinions and behaviors. Freedom of expression is considered important, especially in the US, so there must be many fans who found me interesting in that sense, too. Olympians who finish sixth don't usually receive as much attention as I have. I think it's wonderful to have a lot of opportunities to express myself, as I'm doing now.

How was this personality of yours created?

My parents never told me, "Don't do this." They gave me a lot of freedom, and I tried many things I chose for myself. I fell down and got hurt, so in my way I learned many things.

Did you fall many times?

Innumerably. Even now I often fall. But advancing like this is my life. I can't stay in the same place forever. If you reviewed your life when you were 85 years old and thought, "I have lived a peaceful life without much trouble with others," wouldn't it be so boring? It is silly to spend your life always being concerned about what other people think about you.

You chose figure skating as a way to express yourself. However, as long as you compete as an amateur, others' evaluation of you decides your place. How can you accommodate or reconcile your self-expression with this reality?
I don't think I will be able to reach an accommodation. Ever.

There will always be some people who regard figure skating as unified, and who insist, "You shouldn't do this," "You shouldn't say that." I have no idea how many generations will be necessary from here until the point that skaters can express themselves freely. I never try to hurt anyone, but many people are afraid of me, imagining what I will say next or what I will do next. As an athlete, naturally, I don't want to lose to anyone. I had trained not to place sixth at the Olympics, but to get a medal. It was really difficult for me to accept the result, especially since I didn't fall. But a great many fans said that I should have gotten a medal. Not only bronze. Some people said I deserved the gold medal, and I was very honored. I think I was able to continue skating because such fans supported me.
I don't think I should try to reconstruct my relationship with the USFSA or the judges to become their favorite. I can never pretend to be a person from a cookie cutter just so I can be liked by someone.

At the Olympics, you seemed to react to the result very calmly.

With many TV cameras pointed at me and tens of thousands of fans watching me, I had to keep my mind tough and behave with dignity. But when I went to the back, I cried behind the curtain for 35 or 40 minutes, and then I had a doping test. After returning to the Olympic Village, I cried in the shower for an hour. But while the audience and the cameras were facing me, I thought, "I can't lose my cool right now." That's why I could behave calmly then.